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~ By Steve Finamore

CONTAINER DIARIES

Tag Archives: Teenager

I AIN’T WASTING NO MORE TIME

08 Saturday Oct 2016

Posted by Steve in Bishop Ford High School, John Jay, Lafayette High School, New Utrecht High School, Pete Hamill

≈ 20 Comments

Tags

Dick Bavetta, Drop-out, John Jay, LaSalle Academy, Power Memorial, School, Teenager

When I was a teenager I hated school.

Most felt the same way, I think? 

Difference between you and me? I didn’t persevere. Just gave up.

School?

Ha!

I’d rather hang out, do my own thing. Know what I mean?

Didn’t know the importance of an education. Had no idea. No clue. Who needs school? I’m going to be an Ironworker when I’m 18.  That was the mind-set. That was the wrong mind-set.

Father, mother and older brother all dropped out of school. I followed their lead.

“For a boy to become a man, he must first see a man,” said J.R. Moeringher.

It started with Power Memorial. I was 14. The year was 1978. I lasted three days. Same high school as Dick Bavetta, Ed Klimkowski, Eddie Moss, Larry Petty, Jessie Fong, Mario Elie and Jerry Coles. I recall Jerry poking his head in my classroom first day of school asking how things were going? I looked at him and said to myself, “I hate it.“

Dreams of playing for their basketball team. Saw them play two years before. Said I wanted to be a Panther. Would go around telling everyone. All that was over. Two trains to the city. Too much. Had to wake up way too early.

What next? What do I tell my mother? She’ll be pissed. Ticked off.

Fear not young man. Enroll in John Jay. Seventh avenue. John Corrar. Patty Byrnes. Joe Pepitone. Freshmen and Sophomores in the afternoon. Juniors and seniors in the morning. I can sleep in.

Started skipping classes on the second day; few days later I was history.

Running.

Hiding.

Afraid.

At 15 you have no idea why you fear. (“Hey, get back in school, you can do this…) That’s all I needed. 

Sure they tried to tell me to get back in school. I didn’t listen. An all important attribute. “Listening.”Older guys from the neighborhood preached. Lectured. Some even begged me. My girlfriend Maureen tried to convince me. My ears were closed.

Few weeks later I try LaSalle Academy down on the Lower East Side. Catholic school. Went 8 years to Holy Name. “The Big Lie,” but that’s a story for another time. Nuns, priests, discipline, wooden paddles, uniforms…

LaSalle is The Candy Man’s alma mater. John Roache. Tom Owens. Ron Artest.

The Cullen’s from 175 Windsor Place told me all about LaSalle.Good friends of mine growing up. Jimmy a year older, Frankie two years on me.

Said I would like it. They sure did.

Jerome Washington was a star player at the time. He was cool.Kid could really ball. Had hops too. Saw him one day shooting jumpers in their tiny gym. Thought to myself maybe I can play in the back-court with him?  Poor son of a bitch passed away a few years ago. Think he was 48. Sad.

The LaSalle experiment lasted two months. Sorta. Maybe a month and a half.  On the second day mom gave me $100 cash to buy a few required text books; I spent the money on cokes and buttered rolls every morning before school. On the weekends I would buy a bottle of Wild Irish Rose. The money was gone in 14 days.

Poor Mom, she and I tried John Jay a second time. Things didn’t work out. I lasted two weeks. I was petrified. There seemed to be like 10,000 kids in that school. The hallways were spooky. I didn’t know anyone. I was like a zombie walking the halls. Saw a few kids sneaking out a window in the stairwell. I jumped out with them. Ran up the block to Prospect Park. Walked around thinking this was so cool. Little did I know, I was fucking up.

Tried John Jay one more time.

Fall of 1980. Sixteen year-old freshman. But now a member of the the basketball team. Me, Ron Hardy, Keith Grady, Ed Saunders, Gary Phillips, whom we called ‘Doc’ because boy could he sky. I remember throwing him an ally-oop in practice. He was up so high he was talking to the Lord.  And we had a really cool Hispanic kid from Bay Ridge, Merchado was his last night. One day him and I had two hours to kill before practice so we spent it watching a performance by some dancers in the auditorium. Pete Coakley was the coach; reminded me of the White Shadow. I was having a ball. Not going to class but going to practice. The day we got our uniforms, #30, I wore it outside. That night I slept in it.

Early December we played a few games; I got some playing time. My girlfriend Maureen bought me brand new Nike high-tops.  But it hit me again; I quit the team. Dropped out of school. WTF?

Now what?

Winter of 1981 I start coaching a seventh grade basketball team at Holy Name.

Took a liking to it. Never went back to school. But the game did something for me. Believe it was the Basketball Gods who sent the message.

Fast forward 35 years; took and passed the G.E.D. exam. Enrolled in college. Got my college degree. These days I coach varsity basketball and substitute teach. Right now I have a long-term substitute job until Thanksgiving teaching English 3 and Anthropology/Sociology.

Should have been a teacher. I love being in the classroom with these wonderful kids.

-Red

Hoops135@hotmail.com

WHY? WHY? WHY?

07 Sunday Feb 2016

Posted by Steve in Suicide

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Container Diaries, Depression, High School, kids, Life, Parents, Teenager, Windsor Terrace

This past week our school experienced more tragedy.

A teenage girl committed suicide.

It’s the second time in a month.

This time it was a senior (Last month the young lady was a freshman.)

I’m not sure why these girls did this. We’ll never know actually. But it broke my heart once again.

I recall from back in the day a guy a few years older than me from our neighborhood took his life. I loved this guy. He was awesome. Great athlete. Great family. Great dude! He always treated me well.

The families have to be devastated. Our students are stunned and in shock.

The school has provided

As a father of a 16 year-old daughter, these deaths hit home.

I knew both of these young ladies.

Suicide is a complex issue. Everyone has an opinion on it.

Who really knows what people are going through?

Everyone has problems.

We can never tell what our friends or family are going through.

Suicide is often carried out as a result of despair, the cause of which is frequently attributed to a mental disorder such as depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, borderline personality disorder,[1] alcoholism, or drug abuse,[2] as well as stress factors such as financial difficulties, troubles with interpersonal relationships, and bullying

I found the above content on Wikipedia. I know it’s hard for someone to talk about these problems.

We keep things bottled up. Sometimes it’s too embarrassing for one to discuss what is going on. There’s shame. Call it what you want. But something has to be done.

There’s help but for some reason it must be hard for people struggling to reach out for help.

If you know someone who has talked of suicide, please do something. Don’t just sit there and do nothing. If you notice someone acting differently, speak up.

Life is tough, but we have to do all we can to stick it out.

We have to fight. We can’t let problems lick us. Gotta fight!

Bottom line is we have to work hard to get through our problems – and we need each other.

We can do it. Gotta band together.

I know it’s easier said than done, but we need to pull together and help.

As a group we can defeat suicide.

Red

Hoops135@hotmail.com

 

TOO, TOO YOUNG!

26 Thursday Feb 2009

Posted by Steve in Blog

≈ 42 Comments

Tags

Alexis Gumusdere, Brooklyn College, Camp, Car accident, Danceteria, David Robinson, Death, East 5th Street, F-Train, Jack Curren, Manhattan Beach, Naval Academy, Ocean Parkway, Prospect Park Southwest, Teenager, The Joker, Transit Cop

We often ask why?

Why, why, why?

As I am composing this blog entry, I am saddened to report that a very good friend who I grew up with lost his son in a car accident.

Alexis Gumusdere died at the age of 19.

If the last name rings a bell, well, Alexis was the son of Turhan Gumusdere, A.K.A., Turk.

alexis-gumusdere

Turk was one of my best friends growing up as a teenager.   He grew up on Prospect Park Southwest and Greenwood avenue.  Turk also spent a lot of time at East 5th street playing ball from sun up until sun down.    I first met him at Jack Curren’s basketball camp when I was 14 years old.  He came to my rescue when some kids were making fun of me calling me ‘The Joker” because of my red hair. (We still talk about it 30 years later)

Ever since that day I spent a lot of time with Turk.

We played ball together, went out to clubs and hung out on Brighton 6.

We rode our bikes down Ocean Parkway to Manhattan Beach to play ball, we rode the trains into the city and hung out all over town and while he was a bouncer at 1018, I hung out with him outside watching all the people go inside.

Turk got me in Danceteria and many other clubs around the city.  I recall one night we were on the F-Train and I had a boom box playing just a bit too loud and a Transit cop came out of nowhere and slapped me with a ticket.

Turk also played for Brooklyn College men’s basketball team and one night in particular we were all in the house watching the Kingsmen play the Naval Academy.  Turk was going up and down doing his thing.  Little did we know at the time Navy’s center was a 6’7″ freshman named David Robinson.

Words can’t express how I feel as a parent of a nine year-old.  I wish Turk all the best, I know it’s going to be difficult.  Give him a shout out here on the comments section to tell him you are thinking of him.  He’s a a great dude and his son will be missed by all.

Here is the story from their local newspaper.

-SF

Hoops135@hotmail.com

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