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~ By Steve Finamore

CONTAINER DIARIES

Monthly Archives: July 2008

DADDY DOESN’T LIVE HERE ANYMORE

30 Wednesday Jul 2008

Posted by Steve in Blog

≈ 6 Comments

Tags

Academics, Crime, Divorce, Drop-outs, Family, Father, Pops

As a coach, I deal with kids ages 16 to about 22. They come from all backgrounds. Some have money, some don’t. Some are interested in academia, some aren’t. Some drive cars, some take the bus to school. Some respect others, some are so disrespectful!

But the one thing I notice, the kids who give us the most problems are/were missing one thing at home.

Pops…Dad…Father…The Patriarch…Papa!

That’s right. The undisciplined. The loud and the ones who refuse coaching. The ones who need to bring attention to themselves.

I can see it in their eyes. I can tell who has been disciplined in the past.

The minute you try to correct someone, they put up that fence. They get on the defensive.

“But coach, it wasn’t my fault!”

or,

“Coach, coach, coach…I swear man, I couldn’t make class because I had to…”

The good old excuse!

Doesn’t matter which one, they find one.

How can you possibly tell a kid what to do on the playing field or try to correct him if he’s never been told not to do something?

I actually had a kid last year tell me four different times during the season he had to go to a funeral. Now I never once questioned whether he actually went or not but after the fourth time he used this excuse, my assistant coach said he sang at the funeral!

So the kid never was there! My assistant coach was the singer there, he never saw the kid.

I grew up without a father. He left when I was five years-old. I’m not here to bash him; he’s been long dead. Whenever I look at my nine year-old daughter I could never in my wildest dreams imagine leaving her. Even if things somehow didn’t work out between my wife and I, I would always be a part of my kid’s life.

I ask you, how does a grown man lose sight of the fact he helped bring a child into this world and stop being a part of their life?

I took a social psychology class in college, I learned all about why dads leave their kids. I also took a Family Development class at Michigan State, I understand what happens to kids when pops hits the road and is never seen again.

Plus, I have lived it.

Trust is a word that disappears. You, as a child have been let down by the person you love. The person whom you thought loved you. How do you trust anyone the rest of your life when the one of two important people in your life leaves you hanging?

Little did I realize I lost trust in my father when he promised me he was going to take me to the New York Mets-Cincinnati Reds baseball game for my seventh birthday. He told me he was getting tickets and to be ready. I waited and waited…he never showed. (Try and tell me I made that up…)

Things only got tougher.

As I grew into my early teens I began not listening to anyone! I despised an adult who tried to teach me right from wrong. Coaches tried to teach me how to play the right way; I told them I didn’t need to hear this from you.

Rebellious, standoffish, argumentative, feelings of being inferior, valueless, and lacking…just to name a few of the negative side effects sustained without having a father in my life.

It is a known fact that without a father around, the chances of failing socially and academically are very high. Higher than HAVING a father around.

I read a report that said there are 50% of children going to sleep at night without a father home to say good night to.

How do you justify leaving your children and never taking the time to call them, visit them or have them over your place? Isn’t your duty to explain to them as they get older what happened?

I grew up with a couple of kids in the neighborhood whose dads left them, but I recall them still being part of their lives.

Playing catch, going to a ball game, watching a movie, shooting hoops, taking them shopping for school clothes, attending a ‘Daddy-Daughter’ dance (don’t laugh, they have them here in Michigan). These are all activities vital to a child’s growth.

But fear not, not all kids turn out bad who grow up without a father, but it’s a difficult road. There comes a time when things get better over the long haul.

I found this study/material while doing some research…

Having a father at home is no guarantee that a youngster won’t commit a crime, but it appears to be an excellent form of prevention.

Research shows that:

• 60 percent of America’s rapists came from fatherless homes.

• 72 percent of adolescent murderers grew up without a father.

• 70 percent of long-term prison inmates are fatherless.

source: “Life without Father,” copyright 1996 by David Popenoe. Reprinted by permission of the Free Press, an imprint of Simon & Schuster Inc.

-SF

Hoops135@hotmail.com



HOLY NAME SPORTS HALL OF FAME

29 Tuesday Jul 2008

Posted by Steve in Blog

≈ 15 Comments

Tags

Baseball, Hall of Fame, Holy Name, Rich Gossage, Sports

This past weekend Rich Gossage was inducted into the baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown.

Imagine for a moment Holy Name had a sports Hall of Fame?

Athletes and coaches.

Basketball, baseball, track and field, cross-country, soccer, swimming…(Am I missing anything)?

Intramurals DO NOT count…

You had to have played a sport where you actually put on a uniform and the competition was against other schools.

Let’s hear some nominations?

-SF

Hoops135@hotmail.com

FORMER TEACHER AT HNS

28 Monday Jul 2008

Posted by Steve in Blog

≈ 49 Comments

Tags

Holy Name, Picture, Teacher

This image was sent by a loyal reader of Container Diaries.

We encourage readers to send their pictures, comments or the opportunity to be a guest blogger on anything from back in the day.

-SF

Hoops135@hotmail.com

HANGIN’ IN THE YARD

26 Saturday Jul 2008

Posted by Steve in Brother Joe Mussa

≈ 20 Comments

Tags

Old School, Schoolyard

This image was sent to me by a loyal reader of Container Diaries.

Can you guess who these two are? Click on the image to enlarge…

-SF

Hoops135@hotmail.com

OLD-TIMERS DAY

25 Friday Jul 2008

Posted by Steve in Blog

≈ 9 Comments

Tags

Baseball, Holy Name, Old-Timers Day, Sports

With the Mets and Yankees doing very well and with it being the summer, I will continue with the current baseball/softball theme.

Did you ever attend Old-Timers day at Shea or Yankee stadium?

I recall a few of them back in the day where I would see some of the former players come out and strut their stuff. Willie Mays, Ken Boswell, Jerry Grote, the late Bobby Murcer and many more.

For some reason, baseball memories stand out much more than any other sport. The visuals of plays, players, games, scores, etc. always seem to come to mind quicker in baseball than other sports.

This notice was sent to me by Eddie K on a pretty good Holy Name baseball team from back in the day.

This year marks the 40th anniversary of the then 1968 HOLY NAME Junior baseball team that went on not only to win the Brooklyn-Queens CYO baseball championship but fought our way to win the NYC Greater Sandlot baseball championship for that age group as well.

Coached by Mr. Tufano, our team kept winning games well into the Fall of 1968 in areas in and around the city that most of us never heard of.

This was one of the most successful teams to ever represent HOLY NAME parish!

Some names of the guys that played on this incredible team were: Jimmy Riches, Harry Gonzales, John Conway, Nicky Cannella, Dennis Flynn, Eddie Keyes, John Mahoney, Joe Tufano, and John Luciano(MVP).

Please forgive me for not remembering all of the team members.

If anyone out there has memories of this team it would be great to hear them.

A great bunch of neighborhood guys coached by a terrific man, Mr. Tu.
Congratulations to a great bunch of guys!
-SF
Hoops135@hotmail.com

BATTER UP!

24 Thursday Jul 2008

Posted by Steve in Blog

≈ 10 Comments

Tags

P.S. 107, Softball, Sports, The Wharf Rats

When I was six years old I had aspirations of being a big leaguer some day.  I tried out for a softball team in P.S. 107’s. For some reason they said I was too young.

I was ticked off!

They said I could be the batboy, I was like, Later for that…

Here is a team picture of the 1970 Wharf Rats. (Back Row L to R): The Rock, Carl F, Jimmy D, Paddy C. (Front Row): Jeff A, Erick, Paul K, John L. (MIA – Dennis O’B)

This crew of heavy hitters went up against the likes of Joe Cincotta’a 9th ave team and Lefty’s (Glueman) 12th street.

R.I.F.

21 Monday Jul 2008

Posted by Steve in Blog

≈ 43 Comments

Tags

Barnes and Noble, Basketball, Basketball Digest, Brooklyn Public Library, Grand Army Plaza, NBA, Reading, RIF, Sports, St. Patrick's Day

Quick, name the oldest and largest non-profit literacy organization in America?

Come on, check the acronym in the title of the entry.

YES! Reading is Fundamental.

I lacked the fundamentals of reading growing up in Windsor Terrace. Heck, I actually had a book report due one day in Miss Monzillo’s class and instead of reading the book, I watched the movie the night before. As bright as Miss Monzillo is, she caught me.

RIF had the big truck that drove around different neighborhoods. Too bad the truck kept on rolling through our neighborhood. And if it did stop, I was probably in the schoolyard playing basketball; with zero interest in books.

Fast-Forward a few years later – and boy have things changed.

I now read one book per week! Bio’s, sports, novels, and of course motivational books.

Taylor, my nine-year old is in the library once sometimes twice a week. I allow her to check out 5 books each time we visit. (And of course we make our occasional trip to Barnes and Noble)

I lived on Windsor and 9th for a long time and the Brooklyn Public Library at Grand Army Plaza was within walking distance. I was there a total of 3 times in my life.

There was another Public Library on 6th avenue and 9th street, again within walking distance – you can count how many times I walked through their doors on your hand…one hand.

The New York Public Library on 42nd and 5th in Manhattan? I was in there once. And I think it was to go to the restroom during or after the St. Patrick’s Day parade. Or maybe it was during a day I cut school?

How about the lovely Mrs. Cregg with her book store within a stone’s throw away from my front door all those years? I believe it was called ‘The Bookshelf‘. She would sit behind her counter reading a book in front of the window where she always had a smile and a wave when you passed. I might have been in there 10 to 15 times. In my early twenties I began to go in more and more; always walking directly to the sports section. I’ll never forget picking up Connie Hakwins’ book, ‘Foul‘.

But hey, I would read, don’t get me wrong.

Glenn T and I would await eagerly for the next edition of Basketball Digest to come out at Ray and Otto’s. (When she was hiddy to us, we’d head over to Tokeyo Joe’s on 16th and 9th).

We would read it from cover-to-cover. G’s favorite section was ‘The Game I’ll Never Forget’, where they had a NBA player talk about their most memorable game. My favorite part of the pocket-sized magazine was the last section – the rosters of all NBA teams. I memorized where every player went to college. The crossword puzzle was another favorite part of the magazine. (Do they still publish Basketball Digest?)

The Daily News, Post, Newsday and the Sporting News were three papers I would also get lost in.

Today, as a middle-aged grown up I try and read as much as possible. I can read anywhere from 2 to 5 newspapers per day. I enjoy reading material via the internet and of course books.

Give me a bookstore or library and you probably won’t see me for a few hours. How about this for reading paradise – Michigan State University’s library is open 24 hours a day! Don’t be surprised to see yours truly up on the third floor in the middle of the night when I have Insomnia.

Reading is Fundamental!

SUHEIL’S CREW of 69

21 Monday Jul 2008

Posted by Steve in Blog

≈ 25 Comments

Tags

Brother Lambert, Class of 1969, Holy Name, Vince Lombardi

Here is another boys graduating class of 1969 from Holy Name. (Thanks to SM for the image)

I notice two of my favorite people growing up: Frankie Palazzo and  Georgie Routhier.  Georgie was my first basketball coach for Holy Name’s bantam ‘B’ team.  Our slogan, “B-TEAM POWER!”, we used to chant it walking down Prospect avenue on our way to practice at P.S. 10’s.

Yo Suheil, I love the Vince Lombardi specs!

Brother Lambert…wow.  I heard some stories over the years about him.  Anyone care to share?

Click on image to enlarge…

KNOCKIN’ ON HEAVEN’S DOOR

20 Sunday Jul 2008

Posted by Steve in Blog

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

Bagels, Daily News, FDNY, Holy Name, Sunday morning, Terrace Bagels, Vinny Brunton

A friend of mine who works at the local coffee shop asked me for the URL of Container Diaries last night. I told him to just google ‘Container Diaries’ and it will pop up. But I wasn’t sure if he would find the blog interesting. Hopefully this newspaper article that was sent to me gives him a solid introduction.

It’s 5:20 A.M. and I got up a bit earlier than normal on this rainy Sunday morning. (I can recall back in the 80’s walking through the front door at 5:20 and sleeping all day!)

While everyone’s asleep in my house, I log onto the computer and search for a newspaper article that I had saved from the Daily News back in 2002 on Windsor Terrace.

(Holy Name Church – Image compliments of Icky)

Click here for a story on the neighborhood from writer Joyce Shelby. Here are a couple of highlights from the piece.

“This is a great neighborhood,” said Houlihan as he took a break from working behind the stick, serving tap beer. “I’ll tell you how great. About eight years ago, the priest over at Holy Name [Church] told me the school was in bad shape. It needed painting. In one weekend, 300 people turned out to paint the whole school.”

What an amazing display of human compassion. People coming together for a school that many of us attended as youngsters. (Denis Hamill wrote a story on this project, if anyone has the link or any info, please send it to me)

Behind Houlihan on the mirror overlooking the bar hangs a color photograph and memorial tribute to Fire Capt. Vincent Brunton, who, until the Sept. 11 terror attacks, was a part-time bartender at Farrell’s.

Honoring WTC firefighter

“For Vinny, we did a scholarship fund,” Houlihan continued. “So far, we’ve raised $110,000 for children in the neighborhood to go to Bishop Ford High. That’s what kind of neighborhood this is.”

Vinny Brunton was the salt of the earth. What a great guy. The courage of a lion!

At Terrace Bagels, across the street from Farrell’s on Prospect Park West, Perlman kept employees scurrying, serving up handmade bagels and coffee.

“This is a great place,” he agreed. “It’s safe. Everybody helps everybody. Everybody is friendly. You can count on your neighbors in a pinch. That’s what I call community.”

Terrace Bagels, what a great spot to relax, sip a coffee while reading the newspaper. Not to mention excellent egg sandwiches.

But of course like everything, there has to be a bit of controversy.

And if there is one issue that seems to spark a debate in Windsor Terrace, it’s what having new neighbors has done to the area.

“Ruined the neighborhood,” snapped one life-long tenant who declined to give his name.

Ronny Moore, who has lived in the neighborhood all his life and in the same apartment since 1977, said, “When I moved in, the neighborhood was a beautiful, working-class neighborhood. I knew everybody between where I lived and where I worked.

“Now, I don’t know anybody,” the retired driver said. “The old people from my building have moved, and the new people don’t seem as friendly – or maybe they just want to keep to themselves.”

‘The new people don’t seem as friendly’. Well just remember, if you want a friend, you need to first be a friend! But knowing you Ronny Moore, you have probably reached out to the “newbies” and received nothing in return.

c’est la vie!

-SF

Hoops135@hotmail.com

POPEYE THE SAILOR

17 Thursday Jul 2008

Posted by Steve in Blog

≈ 11 Comments

Tags

Ali Baba's 40 Thieves, Bluto, Cartoons, Olive Oyl, Popeye, Wimpy

Is the fictitious character with the huge forearms on television anymore?

This morning I did a search on our cable box and nothing came up! (a search, isn’t that amazing how you can type a couple of letters in and come up with all the shows that are coming up in the future?)

As a youngster sitting on the living room floor in front of my T.V., I’d lose myself with the comical cast of characters that were before me. I’d dream of hanging with Popeye. Kicking it with Bluto and sharing a burger with Wimpy.

But Popeye was the best. I loved the way he would enunciate.

“I’m strong to the finish because I eat me spinach…”

How many times as a kid while at your dinner table did you hear, “Eat your spinach like Popeye and grow up to be big and strong!”

Umm, excuse me mom, but no matter how much spinach you forced down my throat, I was always skinny as a stick.

I wasn’t a big fan of Olive Oyl – I thought she was annoying and obnoxious.

I liked Bluto – he was cool. I loved the battles he had with Popeye. (What did he eat to get so big?)

Wimpy was cool too. Man could that dude down the burgers, huh? ‘I’ll gladly pay you Tuesday…’

My favorite episode was the the one with Ali Baba’s Forty Thieves.

“OPEN SEZ ME!”

Popeye took ’em all on – counting each one of them as he knocked them out!

I YAM WHAT I YAM!

-SF

Hoops135@hotmail.com

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